Bible Study – Hidden Joy ~ Day 1

Today is Day 1 of the online Bible Study “Hidden Joy in a Dark Corner.”  The Bible study is being offered by Melissa Taylor.

I am feeling nervous, uncomfortable, excited, anxious, relieved!!!  Could this possibility be the start of being free???  I truly pray so….  Will I start AND finish this (because I have started many bible studies but never finished them)  I truly pray so….

Words of the week:  FEAR and DECIDE

  • Many of us are ruled by fear. It paralyzes us. It keeps us from moving forward. We are scared and afraid. And we have good reason!  Take a deep breath my sweet friend.  Let’s all hold hands in cyber space.  Join together.  Eyes up. Lift them up to the Lord. If our eyes are on Jesus, then they aren’t on our fear. Let’s decide to trust.  Let’s decide to believe.  We can do it. We have God. We have each other. Let’s encourage and pray for one another.  Here we go.

Scripture for this week:

  • John 16:33-“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
  • John 14:1-Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me.”(believe=trust)
  • John 14:27- “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
  • Matthew 19:26- Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
  • Isaiah 43:18-19 “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.  See, I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”
  • Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.” (Isaiah 43:1b)

Here are some of what I am feeling and what some of the other comments brought to surface for me:

  • I am ready to get started on this but have to admit to being very nervous and uncomfortable. My personality is if something makes me uncomfortable then I run away and ignore it hoping for it to go away, I pray I stick with this and finish it to the end, if so it will be the first thing I have ever accomplished 100 percent. Also I will apologize now for typos, will be posting mostly from my phone and it has a mind of it’s own!!! Praying for everyone that is taking part in this journey!!!
  • Thank you….I really appreciate it!!! I always start out with good intentions but if I don’t do something perfectly or it makes me uncomfortable I give up!!! I am tired of feeling like a failure in every role of my life.The abuse happened for several years and I repressed the memory until after both of my children were born. It has greatly affected my marriage for all 20 years that i have been married. I decided in April that 30+ years of shame, fear, guilt, anger, and an empty place in my soul was enough.
  • Thank you…..never thought of it that way! I like that: Nervous and uncomfortable is ok, more dependent on God I will remember that once those feelings hit high gear!
  • I get what you are saying bc there are so many days where I dint feel anything; I dont feel joy or sadness….only an emptiness I me, some days I think if only I could at least cry about something maybe I would start feeling some emotions but I can’t even cry–I try to think of the saddest memory I have (the death of my mother) to help me cry and there is nothing there!!! I pray that together we all can learn to allow healing but more importantly living to happen to us.
  • I know exactly what you mean when you say you sometimes don’t know who you are. That is exactly where I am. For a long time I could pretend b/c I had small children who took every minute of my day. I have an autistic son who needed me so much I knew exactly who I was ~ I was the mother of an autistic child! And it was my responsibility to get him through school and to graduate. I never thought what it would mean once he did graduate. I was also mother to a daughter who was a miracle baby and who struggled through school b/c of dyslexia. Then on August 14 of last year my baby girl went off to college and although my son at 21 still needed me, he didn’t need me as much so I found myself with A LOT of time on my hands and no way to stop the memories. My husband didn’t understand when I said to him one day “I just don’t know who I AM and it’s scaring me” and he said “you are my wife” and I thought “yes I am your wife but I need to know who I AM outside of M’s mom and M’s mom and your wife” so here I am……. I hope to learn to be secure in who I am, but I also hope to learn how to define myself other than wife, mother and abuse victim.
  • I thank you so much for offering this study. Funny, I am nervous and uncomfortable but in so many ways I am happier than I have ever been just knowing I am finally able to do something about something that happened to me 30+ years ago…I can finally take control of it and then turn it over to God so I don’t have to carry it around anymore. Wow, I am so ready!!!!

Some of the comments that got me to thinking and that have helped me so far:

  • YOU ARE WORTHY! Feeling are so fickle. You have to decide what you believe, not what you feel. What you have been through is difficult, but it’s not who you are or what defines you.  Go through this study, taking one day at a time. Ask God to bring the belief to you. I will be praying for you.
  • I’m so glad you are doing this study! You can do it! Stay with it my sweet friend. Nervous and uncomfortable is ok. It just makes you more dependent on God.

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