When was the last time you experienced the goodness of God? This was the question I was asked. To be honest, I had to sit and think about it, it took me longer than I liked to come up with the answer and then the answer wasn’t from today, last week, last month or last year. As I sat and realized that I couldn’t answer that question with an experience recently I wondered why.
The answer came with the next question: God is good……all the time! How does that statement make you feel? I thought back through the last year that frankly has been a year of hell – one that I have lived through for the most of the last 22 years. And my first thought was “yeah God is good all the time, that’s why my life is full of chaos.” I then felt mad and wondered when will I feel that goodness in this situation ~ it’s been 22 years!!
Oh but then I was asked what is something that makes you stop and notice God? I immediately listed dozens of things.
- A beautiful sunrise
- the house being still in the early morning hours
- the birds singing
- the sun shining through on a cloudy day
- a cup of coffee in the stillness before the day begins
- when I gaze at our Christmas tree and see the memories of a lifetime ~ the story of our family
And all the sudden I realize, I experience God’s goodness – everyday!!
Do you need to be reconnected with God? I know I definitely do! Why did I forget all those small daily glimpses of goodness and say I haven’t experienced it recently? Because I believe as humans when we don’t get our way exactly as we want we are conditioned to feel punished and then we start focusing on our circumstances. I know for me in the midst of my storm ~ the chaos, the toxic environment, the erosion of our family foundation. I try to fix it through me instead of clinging to Him. I try to fix it by telling myself “you just need to be a better wife and mother.” Then I tell my husband “here is your script to make our family better, here is how to talk to the kids and what you should do with them” I give my daughter her script. Then I tell my son “if you would just listen to me and follow along instead of questioning everything in complete anger we will be fine.”
Oh if I just clung to Him and searched out His goodness. If I just clung to His promises. Oh if I just wait expectantly for His goodness. Oh if I just had eyes of faith, instead of focusing on my storm.
Where are your eyes looking ~ His promises or your storm?
Dear LORD, I come before You with a heavy heart. Full of sadness, uncertainty, despair, weariness, fear, failure, resentment, bitterness, anger and so much regret. You are the Master Healer, please heal my ragged heavy heart with Your touch, reconnect me to You. My head knows that You are good….all the time, show my heart to know that too LORD. Remove all the heaviness of my heart and fill it with You!
“Oh LORD, open my eyes, that I may see” as You did for Elisha’s servant. Give me eyes of faith so that I may know and see Your goodness….all the time, no matter what storm is swirling around me. In the midst of my storm strengthen me just enough to utter “God, be with me. Come and be beside me.” Strengthen me just enough to praise You through the storm and to cling to You through my eyes of faith.
Thank You LORD for marking me with Your indelible seal through my baptism. Thank You that through one holy couple, one holy family, one holy tribe, one holy nation, one holy kingdom, and one holy people You adopted me into Your family and that Jesus’ story is also my story of salvation.
Thank You for loving and caring for me personally and for Your goodness….all the time. In Jesus Name ~~ AMEN!